October is here. That means everyone's lives will start revolving around the wonderful, glorious, remarkably sought after Boob. While, I agree that saving the boobies are very important there is something else I have to bring awareness too. Something that is very close to my heart. Something that is just not advocated for enough.
Not only is October "Breast Cancer Awareness" month it is also "Domestic Violence Awareness" month. Sure, I know, it is WAY more fun to run around in shirts that are pretty and pink and in bold letters say "SAVE THE TA TA'S". I know that men love running around offering to feel our boobies for us in an effort to "check" for breast cancer. I know this specific cancer involves pretty colored jewelry, ribbons, stickers, shirts, and lots of fun variations of the word "breast". However, there are other lives at stake and these people need help too.
Awareness needs to be brought to the violence that families all over the world suffer. Yeah, yeah, I know what you probably want to say, "Why don't these people leave their situation?" and "Well, cancer can't be controlled, you can't leave cancer but you don't have to stay with an abuser!" What if I told you, you were wrong. That's right! W-R-O-N-G!
How do I know? I was married to a psychotic, drunken loser who tried pushing me out windows, punched me when things didn't go his way, chased me around the house with knives, tried to keep me locked up in my home, threatened my life constantly, all while our child watched. He told me if he left he didn't know what he would do. He told me once he'd hunt me down and hurt me and once he told me he'd kill himself.
"Oh is that all?" you ask.
I know it doesn't sound like much but it hurts. It hurts physically and mentally. That's not the only way I know you would be wrong by saying that it is easier to leave though. If you are new to my life you may be unaware that my Aunt Julie (my mom's sister) and her boyfriend, Tom were murdered 1 year, 8 months, and 22 days ago. It was a double murder, suicide. It was the worst, most horrifying call of my life. A call nobody wants. A call that literally put me into shock and dropped me to my knees. I had to double check to make sure I was awake. The voice on the other end didn't seem real. I could barely understand it. It was my mother. The first words from her mouth were "Tia, the bastard shot her! He shot her in the head! That bastard killed my sister" then is was sobbing. Sobbing on both ends of the phone. To make matters worse I was 888 miles away and there were no flights out that day.
You can read an article about it by clicking
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HERE
Why did the bastard shoot her, you ask? Oh, it's simple. She left. She left him to get away from the hell she had been living.
So, please, please, please do not make snap judgments about people who are stuck in these relationships. Be supportive. Be there. Be a listening ear. Be a crying shoulder. Be an escape. Be a friend. Don't be an "I told ya so". Don't be a judge. If you are a true friend, just be there. When an abused family member or friend is ready, they will come to you for help. They know their situation is bad. They know what they should do. They know they need to get away. Do you think they WANT to be there? My Aunt stuck around for 12 years! She lived through and endured 12 years of pure hell! Why didn't she leave sooner? Well, do we really need to ask now?
Are you a Domestic Violence Sufferer in need of support?
Do you need more information on Domestic Violence and understanding what it is?
Please call this number::
Domestic Violence Hotline::1−800−799−SAFE(7233) or TTY 1−800−787−3224.
You can also visit their website by clicking
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HERE
You can go back to many of my other blogs and read about this horror story and how I dealt with it by clicking any of these links::
Part 1. Just a few thoughts from the week...
Part III. Anybody know where I went?
How much are our thoughts really worth?
Does forgiving someone mean I also have to forget?
Pass the purple thread please.... (this was the one year anniversary)
I truly hope that everyone will take some time this month to get the word out about Domestic Violence!!
Thanks for reading!
