Just one bite...

Every God fearing woman says that "The Period" and painful childbearing is God's punishment for Eve's little apple eating mishap.  Honestly I am lost on this whole apple eating sin!  She is the worst woman ever!  I have to tell you, the only way a serpent is going to tempt me into eating a dang apple is if it is on a stick, covered in caramel, and rolled in nuts!   I mean COME ON!  A bite of a plain old boring apple screwed the the whole population, mainly women.

Like I said in the first line of this blog, a lot of women complain that the crimson tide and painful baby havin' is God's way of punishing us for letting a snake tempt us and in turn tempting Adam.  Being a stay at home mom (SAHM) for the last 7 years has made me realize that it is not "The Period" that is the punishment.  It is, in fact, LAUNDRY!  That's right, I said it!  Someone had to speak the truth!  Laundry is the women's punishment for giving into temptation!


Don't believe me?  Think about it!



I am very aware that God stated "I will make you pains in childbearing very severe;  with painful labor you will give birth to children"  

HOWEVER, he also made Adam and Eve ashamed of being naked and "Made garments of skin for Adam and his wife and clothed them"  Did you read the second to the last word in that??  CLOTHED!!!!!!

Painful childbirth=Smoke screen 

Yep, that's right!  I know you are now thinking "HOLY CRAP, SHE IS RIGHT!!!!"  (and as usual I am)

God clothed us, further punishing women by forcing us into a NEVER.ENDING.CYCLE of washing, drying, folding, hanging and repeating UNTIL.WE.DIE.

Let's not forget that us women are constantly having to pick up other family member's socks, shirts, pants, UNDERWEAR!!  One day I will probably bend over to pick up all of the socks all over my house and I will never be able to get back up!  Laundry is a slow death!

Had Eve never eaten that apple we would all be running around as a happy, healthy, fun loving nudist colony with no shame whatsoever!

I know, I know!!!  Your head is spinning right now!  I know mine was when I realized God's conspiracy.
Thanks a lot Eve!  Thanks a freakin' lot!